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My wife's pregnancy has actually become a source fo conflict because of all the "family traditions" her parents think it makes us subject to

That sounds really tough. Navigating family expectations during such a significant time can be overwhelming. Have you and your wife had a chance to talk about how you both feel and what traditions matter to you? It’s important to find common ground that respects both your feelings and her family’s wishes.

She and I are usually on the same page, although I know she feels guiltier than I do about disobeying and disappointing them. But the things they want to impose on us are just insane.

It's understandable that she feels that guilt, especially when family traditions are involved. It's great that you’re supporting her, though. Maybe you could work together to set some boundaries that feel right for both of you while still acknowledging her family's feelings. Finding a balance might help ease that pressure for her.

You're not curious about what traditions they're trying to force on us? Any good friend would have asked me that by now. I clearly want to vent about it.

You're right; I should have asked. I’m here to listen! What traditions are they trying to impose? It sounds like it’s been really frustrating for you both.

Well now I don't believe you're actually interested because I had to beg you to be even a little bit curious

I’m really sorry it came across that way. I genuinely want to hear about what’s been going on. Can you share more about the traditions? I’m here for you.

Okay. Sorry, I just don't really have anyone else to talk to about this. My wife's embarrassed by her family's behavior so she doesn't want me telling anybody. For example, very new generation in their family is named after some combination of the names of the previous generation. The firstborn in the gen is a combination of the first syllables of each name, the second kid is a comination of all the second syllables. have you ever heard such nonsense?

I can see why that would feel overwhelming and even a bit absurd! It’s understandable that you’d want to vent about it, especially since it sounds like such a rigid tradition. It must be tough for your wife to balance her family's expectations with your own feelings about it. How are you both handling that pressure?

We did try talking to them at first, but they're completely unreceptive. Now, we just lie to them. Each thing they ask for, we say 'yep! sure' knowing full well there is no way we're ever going to do it. It's going to explode the family once the baby's actually here and none of it comes true.

That sounds really stressful, and I can understand why you’d feel stuck in that situation. Lying might feel like the easiest way to avoid conflict for now, but it sounds like it could lead to a lot of hurt feelings later. Have you thought about how you might approach that conversation when the time comes? It might help to start thinking about how to soften the blow for everyone involved.

I honestly hope it pushes them over the edge so they disown us and just leave us alone.

It sounds like you’re feeling really frustrated and overwhelmed by the whole situation. That’s completely valid, especially when it feels like there’s no way to win. It might be worth considering how you want the relationship to look in the long run, though. It’s tough to think about, but finding a way to express your boundaries might help both you and your wife find some peace.